“I miss the old me” & Other Things You Say After a Weekend of Binge Scrolling on the Gram

“I miss the old me” & Other Things You Say After a Weekend of Binge Scrolling on the Gram

Comparison will steal your joy, your brain cells and the will to brush your hair.

Except maybe when you’re reading old influencer posts about the Fyre fiasco and how they were forced to sleep in $25,000 tents (aka, the VIP suite) that looked like something from the Red Cross collection. Note: not much sleeping went on.

Then, comparison feels like a sweet elixir of validation.

Now please tell me I wasn’t the only one glued to the gram this weekend?

I learned lots of interesting things. Wanna hear? Ok, twist my arm why dontcha!

Well, there’s a whole new dating vocabulary. Did you know?

Like ‘orbiting’ which is when you’ve been ghosted (ignored) but the person still follows you around on social. Creepy right?

Then there’s ‘breadcrumming’ which is when you’re sent flirtatious texts like – babe, wanna wrestle – but then they never show or make an effort to, ya know, meet. Can you even?!

And finally there’s ‘kittenfishing’. Anything with kitten sounds lovely, warm and snuggly. Except that what’s going on is smoke and mirrors. Outdated photos, faux ages, exaggerated income stats, weight, hair thickness, that sort of thing.

Which brings me back to comparison. Look, it’s a dog. Not like Lassie. More like Kujo. Don’t. Even. Seriously. You’re good just the way you are…right now, in this very moment.

Buuuut, if you feel a wee sad comparing your copy to other people’s copy check out the goodie below. I’ve got just what you need.

PS. between the breadcrumbs and the fishing I felt like orbiting to a Chic-fil-A with my neighbors cat for company. Happy Monday!


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